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The Oprah Winfrey Show Version

"E" is for Enlightenment - Go for it!

East London boy guru Oshana played for the second time to capacity crowds at Fraser Clarke's "Den of Enlightenment" in Brixton. It was standing room only as seasoned ravers and clubbers, still sweating from their physical exertions on the dance-floor, eagerly crammed into a corridor to catch a glimpse of Guru Oshana demonstrating his unique "questions and answers" approach to enlightenment. Oshana was dialoguing with Kate, a pretty Cambridge under-graduate, who been treated by shamans after breaking her back in the Amazon jungle.

Scenes from the "The Matrix" played in the background, as Kate recounted the unusual phenomenon which had occurred when she last met Oshana. Initially, she had been nervous and aware of the audience. But as Oshana spoke she became calm, and then suddenly - he disappeared! Oshana related how he had repeatedly attempted to keep Kate out of trance.

Kate declared that she wanted to develop her full potential, but was concerned that a female Buddha did not have boyfriends. Oshana reassured her, "Nothing has to change." The normally reserved British audience started to act like they were on the Oprah Winfrey show. They cheered when Oshana exclaimed, "We are all blissful and happy inside" and egged Kate on to "Go for it!" Kate described how she suddenly and unaccountably felt peaceful.

Oshana left the club at 5a.m. How many gurus do you know who would do that?

[Source: Oshana Mailing List]